A national columnist who writes about parenting issues recently wrote about “tech tools” available to parents to monitor their teen drivers. The article did a nice job of summarizing the features available, why parents should install them, and the costs.
However, the lead up to the review of the tech tools says this:
“Anybody who has teen drivers in the house has probably spent fretful moments waiting for their child to come home after a night behind the wheel, particularly in the first year after getting their license.
If you’re like me, the interrogation begins right after your teen hits the front door: Where did you go? Did you get on the highway? Who else was in the car? And did you remember to pull over to the side to answer your cellphone?”
Again, I commend the writer for his focus on safe teen driving and review of monitoring technology. But the quote above is, unfortunately, an illustration of what parents should not do — which is ask these questions when teens arrive home. Supervision of teen drivers needs to occur BEFORE a teen gets behind the wheel. The questions are not “Where did you go?” and “Who else was in the car?” but “Where are you going?” and “Will you have any passengers, and if so, who are they?” An interrogation “after a night behind the wheel” is too late. And while we’re at it, a teen spending “a night behind the wheel” is a bad idea.
On this blog and in my book Not So Fast I have frequently advocated that parents act like air traffic controllers, going through a safety checklist with their teens each time before they get on the road. The questions quoted above are like an air traffic controller asking a pilot who has just landed a plane “Where did your flight originate?” and “What was your route?” Those questions, asked after the plane has landed, don’t do much good for safety. The same is true of parent questions at the front door when a teen arrives home.
